Yours, Mine, And Hours

This is an essay about the Mikveh, a subject that may be unfamiliar to you, and I'll get to that presently – but first some preliminaries.

American society (actually most others as well) has changed. There was a time when the vast majority of “Western” nations were ruled by a law that was based, primarily, on the Bible. There was “good” and there was “bad,” and the rules were reasonably straightforward. Perhaps they didn't always seem “fair,” but that question wasn't really ours to decide or judge.

Eventually lines were drawn between Church and State, and, ultimately, especially with the establishment of the secular state, the whole idea of “right” – such a judgmental construct especially for those who didn't accept theological definitions – was supplemented and, in many respects, superseded by “Rights” which were assigned by the State. These rights were often based on “right” and “wrong” as viewed through the lens of fairness, with “fairness” determined by those on the ground floor – those who wrote the governing documents – and subsequently by the societies in which the new rules were applied. Indeed, cultural “norms,” fads and vogues are often the determinants of “rights.”

Most of the recently discovered rights have centered around minorities, victimhood, and sensitivity. People saw threats in words and images that were intolerable in a fair and liberal modern society, and they sought to eliminate such evil. (Apart from censorship by rulers – religious and secular – there had mainly been restrictions in the past based on what were said to be matters of national security, but in the modern cases sensitivity and fairness were more at issue.) For example, pin-up calendars, long a staple of men's lockers, were decreed to be degrading to women (along with wolf whistles) and all but outlawed. And, similarly, looking at, or otherwise paying unwanted attention to women, or men for that matter, is now considered sexual abuse.

We have also created the category of “hate crime” to show our sensitivity to victims of violence caused by those who are biased against them – usually demonstrated by voiced statements of the perpetrator, and their interpretation by the victim. Of course that might raise problems. If a prejudiced mute assaults a deaf or intellectually challenged minority member, is it a hate crime? In fact the whole idea of a “hate” crime is bizarre. If a bigot insults, and then kills, a minority member over a woman – a “crime of passion” – is it a “love” crime? All crimes are “hate” crimes. If I'm mugged it's the action, not the thought, that angers me. Frequently attributed to Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr. among others is the aphorism concerning the right to swing your arms ending at the other man's nose. The reason for swinging is irrelevant.

A more recent concern – and this will get me to my main point – is the ruling in many jurisdictions that transgender individuals may use whatever rest room they choose. Sexual restrictions based on birth are biased, and take away the self definition rights of the individual – the right to choose his/her/their/its own self-image. Rest rooms should be gender neutral and everyone should have the right to use whatever facility seems more comfortable (as long as there are no pin-up calendars). Actually, money could be saved by only having a single facility.

But what has all this to do with the Mikveh? In fact, what is a Mikveh?

According to Jewish law it is necessary, before engaging in certain ritual and family actions, to be “pure.” Impurity may arise from a variety of different situations such as (in addition to others) contact with the dead, menstruation, and particular kinds of oaths. The Mikveh is a ritual bath where such purification can take place. The process is also a basic part of conversion, and the new convert is made ritually pure during the ceremony.

The ritual of Mikveh, therefore, is one which may involve both men and women, but the reality is that purification following menstruation is the most frequent situation in which it is used. Thus the facility is reserved for women during most of the hours it is open, but there are times set aside for men who may wish to use it. Separation of the sexes – especially in a situation like this when the involved individual is completely disrobed – is a feature of Judaism. So there are strict schedules governing the Mikveh's use.

There was a recent scandal in the Jewish community when it was learned that a rabbi had been spying on women who were using the facility. Voyeurism has long been an affliction of mankind (literally – “man” is usually the sex of the culprit) however this particular disclosure was considered especially heinous because of who was involved and where it had taken place. But perhaps we overreacted.

While there are traditions in Judaism of modesty and privacy, there are no explicit prohibitions of voyeurism in the Torah, so however we may feel about it personally our revulsion lacks Biblical support. (Indeed, while we condemn certain sexual unions, and while we reject violence that is unassociated with the control of evil or the service of G-d's will, “sexual abuse” is not specifically forbidden. Maybe it's a good thing. Or maybe that's going too far.)  So perhaps the best solution to the problem is to open the Mikveh to all people at all hours.

One thing is certain. The fewer taboos there are on sex, and the more familiar we are with, and thus immune to, the bodies of our sisters and brothers, the less interesting the whole topic of sex will be to the evil-minded among us. Of course it will also be less attractive to the rest of us. Maybe the old days were better.