The Death Of Archie Andrews

We were both born at about the same time, though he, like Adam,ⁱ started out full-grown – or, at least, as a teen-ager. And he never grew old.

I began as a baby and I'm considerably older now. I don't read comic books any longer but I was saddened when I learned from news reports that Archie had been killed. Life isn't fair.ⁱⁱ I know that over the years things have changed, but my memory hasn't moved on. The Archie Andrews I knew, like the one just shot, was young, though in my mind he hadn't matured philosophically in the way the comic book character did. He reflects the zeitgeist of my youth, rather than twenty-first century American culture. I aged but didn't change. He changed but didn't age.ⁱⁱⁱ

So I was saddened by his death. But I was horrified when I learned the circumstances. Apparently Archie took a bullet to protect his friend Kevin Keller,^iv a gay^v senator. (I never knew Kevin. I do remember, however, Jughead, Betty, Veronica, Reggie, and even Moose. And I remember sort of humorous depictions of High School life.) Senator Keller was an advocate of gun control which, whatever its merits, was never an issue when I was reading comic books.^vi Life was simpler then, and childhood was childhood.

When I was young comics told a story. They might have been humorous, or action, or even love. But they were stories. I guess there were messages in them, but when that was the case they were more reflections of common culture or dreams as they were, than prescriptions for what should be.

It seems that the comics no longer cater to the imagination, but are more involved in indoctrination into modern (liberal) thought – like newspapers and the rest of what we're feeding them. The funny papers are no longer funny. The escape from reality for which we turned to the comics has been replaced by “real” life and the lessons of how we should respond to it. It is the catechism of what should be. It's never too early to start teaching those lessons.

I guess that's a good thing. Shielding children from what used to be adult concerns is paternalistic. It's more important that we introduce them to the world that we have created. And the earlier the better. They have to be prepared. So even before it's born, we speak to the developing fetus (if it isn't our choice to abort it), and direct musical sound waves through the amniotic fluid. All the while we eschew good food in favor of that which is nourishing, and wine and coffee in favor of bottled water and organic green tea.

But it's certainly worth the sacrifice, as are the “Baby Mozart” and “Baby Einstein”^vii which we begin soon after the birth of the new being. And we're sure to register our offspring as early as possible in the finest pre-K and prep school.^viii Just as being a child has changed so much since the time I experienced it, so too have the responsibilities of parenting.

I can't help thinking, though, that we're making a mistake in both cases. We're too caught up in the fads, fashions, and, sadly, the fallacies of our times. We're too intent on making sure our children are prepared for the world in which we live to let them enjoy the one in which they live.

Mr. Weatherbee and Miss Grundy may no longer be redeemable, but our children are; comics may not be the highest form of art that we know, but it's the one to which children can relate. The modern “improvement,” “graphic novels” are fine for adults who want to pretend that they're reading, and they're as good a place as any for teaching cultural values and for presenting political propaganda, but we should leave it to them. Kids just want to have fun. Whether the stories are silly or fantastic and unrealistic, the comic stories of old were fun. There was plenty of time afterward to learn about what were viewed, a few years ago, as adult concerns.

The Archie Andrews I remember from the time I was young and reading comic books got into a lot of scrapes with his classmates and had some flirtations with his girl friends. Neither he nor I was “grown up,” and the situations we faced were straightforward issues of “right” and “wrong” unencumbered with the moral issues of the day.

But those days are past. We can't lose time. Childhood is the optimal time for learning and we can't waste it. There's no time for black and white, only gray – because that's what is. There is no right and wrong. Parents^ix are now weighed down with the cultural issues of the twenty-first century, and they're taking their children down with them. Archie Andrews is dead.

Fortunately my memory of what he used to be isn't.

Next episode:   “Just The Facts Ma'am" -- If such exist.


 

I        And Topsy.

ii       But I'll discuss that sad fact in a few weeks.

iii      Actually he did age, but not all that much. And it was more spiritual and emotional than physical.

iv       The only Keller I knew in those days was Charlie. He played for the Yankees. But King Kong died, at the age of 74, almost a quarter of a century before Archie.

v       Homosexual. Not the cheerful, optimistic, devil-may-care personality which characterized the Archie Andrews I knew years ago.

vi       Nor was premarital sex, though I read somewhere that Archie was thinking about marrying the mother of his child.

vii      In reality, which we think we're teaching, these programs have not been shown to be of any benefit. Except to the companies that make money from them, and to the parents who feel virtuous spending that money.

viii     We may even notify the college of the heritage who will be coming their way in the future, and the contribution that will accompany him or her.

ix       And comic book artists.