Mixed Grill XXXII

I'm on a roll. No, I'm not a hot dog. But I am hot.

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Lord high executioner – The media

Boutique – Low rent. High prices

Artisinal – Smaller portion (or item of another sort). No better than the original. Higher price

Flies time when they're having fun – It's not a rat race any more. It's buggy

The Empire Sate Building – Where you can get a filling meal high in everything (including price)

Dead Sea scrolls – Unresponsive snails

Canterbury tales – Some of the archbishop's choicer homilies

Let's all say grace before we eat – Please Grace, pass the potatoes

STEM education – Leaves us rootless. Emphasizes science at the expense of history and literature

Throw out the baby with the bathwater – Blithering idiom

One of these things is not like the others. One of these things just doesn't belong – Profiling. Lesson one

Incorrupt politician – Oxymoron

Everything's up to date in Kansas City – Rodgers and Hammerstune

Gentlemen, start your engines – Sign in Indianapolis brothel

Gravestone epitaph

Dust to dust

Ashes to ashes.

He's here (if you've wondered

Where Ogden Nash is)

Dodecahedron – Star Wars version of a London bus

Hogan's heroes – Navajo sandwich shop. It's the wurst

Politically incorrect – Not using my euphemisms

Pass the chicken – Move him to the front lines

I must go down to the seas again, to the lonely sea and the sky,

And all I ask is a 54 foot yacht and a GPS to steer her by.

(John Masefield)

Cookie Monster – Unhealthy. We need a gluten-free Cookie Monster

Holy Roman Umpire – Official in Vatican's soccer league

A penny for your thoughts – Why for two cents …

Here's the skinny on our new drink – No calories

Twenty-dollar Bills – Toms, Dicks, and Harrys charge more, but they do a better job

With my eyes wide open I'm cheating on my income tax – There aren't many audits. Just this once. It isn't really a risk

Alternate news – Evidence of ignorance. It should be “alternative.”

Straight flush – What you have to show when you play poker in the crapper. Now wash your hand

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A fine pickle you've gotten into. It's not my fault. All I do is present the junk food. You consume it.

May 7, 2017