Mixed Grill XX

Pay no attention to the numbers. They indicate the order in which I assembled these pathetic lists, not always the order in which they're published.

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I love the smell of napalm in the morning (Apocalypse Now)

À la card – Lunch on credit

Big Apple – Doesn't keep the doctors away

Kill, kill, kill – Give thanks. We have restored Arlo's rant

Mantra la la – Music in a man cave

Welcome – Yo!

Telephone – Medieval instrument of communication

Can't help loving that man of mine – He has Viagra-resistant ED but there's lots of good fish in the sea and I'm flexible. Very flexible

Beethoven's Fifth – Made by Schlitzer Korn & Edelobstbrennerei GmbH

Did you ever see a dream walking? – Are you afflicted with somnambulism?

Selling Points –

Artisanal – Catchword for the day. Overpriced

Hand-crafted and Artsy – Kitchy and overpriced

Fashionable – Ugly and overpriced but there are those who'll pay and brag

Gluten Free – Except for celiacs, useless. Overpriced for both

GMO Free – Scientifically unsound and overpriced

Kosher – Supervised but overpriced

Kosher For Passover – Really overpriced

Natural – Consistent with the laws of nature and overpriced

One of a Kind – White elephant – Overpriced

Organic – Scrawny and covered with manure. Overpriced

Top of the Line – Plenty of useless features. For the egotist. Overpriced

Remember, as the advertisers say, The more you buy [spend], the more you save [and the more we make]

New administration cabinet – According to opponents, overPriced.

Mairzy dotes and dozy dotes – And liddle lamzy divey (old English nursery rhyme – altered and commercialized Milton Drake, Al Hoffman & Jerry Livingston)

If you see something, say something – Or is it better not to get involved?

Suffer in science – journal retraction

I am a camera – I used to be a telephone but now I'm smarter

Bye now, pay later – Travel with plastic

A run for the money – Charitable fundraising

Klaatu barada nikto (The Day The Earth Stood Still) – Wouldn't you like to know what it means?

March madness – Political protest. You needn't wait until next month

Chickery chick, cha-la, cha-la

Check-a-la romey in a bananika

Bollika, wollika, can't you see

Chickery chick is me?

Money maker in 1945. By Sylvia Dee – Rap's worse

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And so it goes. And so do I.

PS – Happy Valentine Day. According to Wikipedia, which sometimes gets it right, in 1969 the Catholic Church removed St Valentine from the General Roman Calendar. But flowers and chocolate still do the trick.