Mixed Grill XLIX

More colorful words to dye for.

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You herd it here – Advertising slogan from Texas

NAZI – Nauseating Anti-Zionist Imbecile (in this context “Zionist” is a code word for “Semitic,” while elsewhere it may mean “Israeli,” “Israel,” “Jew,” or “Jewish”)

Gatorade – Crocodilians went from the boys' camp to the girls'

Chop sticks – Ax handles

Farcebook – What can I say with a straight face about that waste of time. Lots of time

ETD – And if you believe that I have a bridge to sell you

Ginger ale – Rail against soda

Bejeweled Deringer – Show gun

Brexit – Engress

Wattever – Any light bulb will do

Kickapoo joy juice – It ain't just for breakfast anymore

We're on the same page – unfortunately we're using different books

Head set – Ralston. Music during breakfast without disturbing anyone

Oxymoron – Creation of a moron

Tit for tat – Not tot?

Saving grace – What about Private Ryan?

A house is not a home – Nor anything but a grandstanding doctor

True grits – Breakfast of champions (credit: Naomi Rosen)

Gun of a son – Forgot to lock it up, did you?

All's well that ends – Well, maybe not all

To be or not to be – Don't worry young Hamlet, there are social promotions for all, even the antisocial

Wine and women – Sing for your supper

Eat, drink, and be merry – Like Santa Claus, ho ho ho. Merry Saturnalia

Adam and Yves – The first gay couple (It didn't last until the transgender surgery. Cain and Abel were adopted. Don't see Genesis)

Social media – Friendly psychics

Den of iniquity – Any office nowadays

Pi r² – Nonsense. Pies are round (except some rectangular pizzas) . Cakes may be squared

President of the United Stats – Used to be a math PhD

The Greatest Story Ever Told – Winner of liar's contest

Pray before you leap – Look also

The mother of all wars – So who was the father?

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Jackson Pollack had nothing on me.

September 3, 2017